After the Ink Dries: The 5 Stages of an Indie Author Surviving the Universe

Stage 1: The Void (Loss and Disorientation)

So here’s what I’ve learned in my indie-author journey thus far. Not the writing part—not where you pull your soul out of your chest and transcribe it onto pages. That I don’t have the words for yet.

I’m talking about the part after… after it’s all in book form and you’re ready to sell it. Yep, I’m talking about the part where the book meets the universe.

First and foremost, there will be a sense of loss. This book—this book baby you have been creating for years—is out in the universe and now… now what? You’re on the other side of this enormous goal you set for yourself with no map. You will also lose sense of self, sense of routine, and sense of purpose.

Stage 2: The Delusion (Fantasy of Instant Fame)

It is important that you be fueled by supreme delusion. You must envision this book of yours on every list there is and on every talk show that exists. You will believe that if you hustle enough, you’re going to be a bestseller, because that’s what you believe success looks like. That’s what all the Disney movies looked like: writer completes manuscript, cue the printing presses, million-dollar book sales.

That will not happen. If it does, it will be to a very select few.

I have not been selected… yet (do you hear that, universe? I’m not ruling it out. Still manifesting this actively with my sage and lavender oils).

Stage 3: The Low (Disappointment and Filtering)

So the bestseller author thing won’t happen, and it will be frustrating. You’ll want to give up. People close to you will quickly laugh, demean, and make jokes because they’ve never bothered to follow a dream outside of the traditional “get married, have kids, live in the suburbs” (not that there’s anything wrong with that). But your desire for more fuels their desire to demean: “Oh, you’re a big shot now? So what are you going to do with all your free time? Have you made it?” Invitations to book events or book updates will be met with silence or ‘unavailability.’ 

This will be a low, a sense of disappointment. 

It is then very important to: cut those people out or make sure they fall on the very outer edges of your periphery of importance. “Friends” get downgraded to acquaintances or blocked. Co-workers can be ghosted, and family can be redirected through third parties if they need to communicate with you. Protect your energy fiercely.

Stage 4: The Hustle (Connection and Growth)

Then you’ll start hustling: marketing, calling bookstores, learning Canva, YouTubing “how to be a bestseller.” It won’t work exactly as planned—but it may connect you to the amazing people you now have room for in your life (because you kicked the assholes out).

You’ll meet generous, artistic, gifted, beautiful people—people who inspire you, make space for you, and encourage you to keep going.

Honestly, this has been my favorite part.

Stage 5: The Acceptance (Own Your Terms)

Swiftly after that comes an incredible sense of acceptance: being an indie author is a long-term gig. It’s okay to work at your day job and continue to write on the side (like you always have). It’s okay to realize that success comes at a cost and sometimes involves compromises you don’t have to agree to.

Unlike every Hollywood actor who says, “Don’t have a plan B," because they have their wives and parents secretly funding their dreams.

I say, "Always have a job. Make your art on your own terms."

She who funds it, is the one who creates it and has final approval.

Within that acceptance, you’ll realize that all those authors in all those bookstores weren’t best-selling authors—they were nurses and teachers and mailmen and mothers who simply wanted to share their stories. And you have joined the ranks of those amazing humans. And that’s pretty cool.

There is no single definition of success. And I reject the one that says, “The only way to succeed at one thing is to sacrifice everything else.”

So keep the day job. Always be able to pay for your own croissant and coffee. Take it all in. This is your life—observe the characters in it. It’s pretty freaking great. How lucky are you that you can take all the crazy happenings of the world, all your favorite things, and blend them in your mind to distill stories?

Because if, after all the disappointment, heartbreak, and wrong turns, you still long to put words on a page… then baby, that’s all the proof you need to be a writer.